Transcending Trials and Celebrating Triumphs! - Laura Cain- Radio Icon - S3E13

Prepare to be awestruck as we journey alongside the remarkable Laura Cain, an illustrious radio icon who's well known through the San Diego airwaves for over three decades. Laura's journey is one of resilience, transformation, and triumph, as she candidly shares her sixteen-year sobriety journey, the challenges she overcame, and the life she's built since. From her humble beginnings as an intern, she ascended the ranks to become a celebrated radio host, even earning a spot in the radio hall of fame. Her adventures are nothing short of fascinating - co-hosting on Regis, winning a trip to France on the Price is Right, and even being a sit-in at the Academy Awards.

Get ready to be inspired as Laura divulges her journey of manifesting a whopping $27,000 to fund her daughter's college education, a testament to the power of vision, initiative, and gratitude. We also delve into the principles of the four agreements as a roadmap to a happier, more fulfilled life.  Laura also gives us a sneak peek into her YouTube channel, Laura Cain After Dark Brace yourself for a riveting episode filled with wit, wisdom, and a lot of heart. This is one episode you don't want to miss!

 Tune it to Laura Cain After Dark

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Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:14

Hey, I'm Coach Mickey and I'm so glad that you guys have joined us and if this is your first time joining us, come on in and make yourself comfortable. For those of you that joined us on a regular basis, I am so glad that you do, and thank you so much for reaching out to all of our guests and I'm really excited that many of you support these people that have been on, whether it's their endeavors or their events or even some of the products that they have. So thank you so much. You guys are an awesome circle of friends and don't forget to, as on Mickey's inspiration wear and also for our coffee cups, you guys can get your own cup and you know that all of those proceeds are going towards my be fearless scholarship that I'm going to give out to at the end of the year for a woman who deserves that, a young woman who deserves that, going away to school maybe multiple if you guys really step up, we'll have more scholarships to give away and, as you guys can see on the other side of me, I am really excited to have her on. I have known this woman vicariously for many, many years and tell you how things come full circle. I am really excited to have her on my podcast and for many of you that follow me, you probably already know who she is, but for those of you that don't, I'm going to read you a little bit about her bio.

Speaker 1: 1:24

Laura Kane has served as a radio icon in San Diego for over 30 years. She's best known as a member of the Radio Hall of Fame inducted program from the Jeff and Jerry show Graham. Laura got her start as an intern at KFMB during her senior year at San Diego State University. She gained a loyal following. Believe me, she has a great following and following remarkably transparent on the air about sharing everything in her life, from birth, death to rehab, to divorce, to surviving and everything in between. I have followed her through the years, even on this next part. She has two kids, charlie, who is 23, and her daughter, evan, who is attending a university in New York City. And the fun facts about Laura is she was co-hosted live on Regis in New York City, she won a trip to France on the Price is Right and she is 16 years sober. And I'm going to throw in a couple other things that I do know about you, laura. I knew you were a sit in at the Academy Awards, because I saw you on the Academy Awards.

Speaker 2: 2:29

I forgot to put that in my bio. I got to put that in my bio.

Speaker 1: 2:33

So anyway, without further ado, I am thank you for being with me today. How are you?

Speaker 2: 2:39

Hi. I'm so, so, so honored to be on your podcast, Mickey, because you and I have worked together throughout the years in different ways. But I remember when I was on a radio show just like you mentioned, jeff and Jere I would have a slumber party and you would come and teach us all self-defense, and that was the one thing I really looked forward to the most was you being up there on stage with me showing women how to protect ourselves. I will never forget that. I really, really you're so awesome.

Speaker 1: 3:12

It was so much fun going to and having an opportunity to be there and do that. But also I want to mention to everybody who is watching please take a look in Laura's background, because she is almost the host of Laura Kane After Dark and I highly recommend you guys are going to have all those links into the bottom of the YouTube video too, so you can reach out to her. But one of the couple things I want to touch on and I know this is very, very dear to you and I've kind of followed your story. I mean, through all these years, like I said, we've kind of known each other vocariously and then getting to meet each other. But I was kind of I mean listening to you on the radio. And first of all, congratulations 16 years of being sober, that's a huge accomplishment and I know that is a journey every single day.

Speaker 2: 3:55

Oh my gosh, every day. What, like they say? As cliche as it sounds, it's so true. One day at a time with anything? Really, if you think about it, that's true If you're stressed. One day at a time, just take it one day, that's all we have.

Speaker 1: 4:10

Yeah, you know and it's good and it's hard because, especially for someone like you that has, I know you've got, you've gone through so many different things through your life. I mean, like I said, because I've listened to you for so long, I know the journey that you've gone through, whether it's been through your divorce, I mean I even when I knew, when you were pregnant with Evan, you know so, I mean I know your whole story. You've always put yourself out there and just telling you as a listener, even prior to knowing you, the strength and the inspiration that you offer through all the struggles. You know always came through the airwaves and I think, for especially a radio host, because you never really know who who's live you're touching. But I know for a fact, laura, you have touched so many people's lives just with what you've gone through and what you've done.

Speaker 2: 4:56

Well, thank you so much for saying that, because I remember when it all went down 16 years ago, I was heavily drinking, I was heavily using and, and I remember going to rehab, obviously for three months, and they told people well, I was on the air that I was dealing with family issues because they wanted to keep it private. But I knew in my heart I'm like, okay, I either have to tell exactly where I was, what happened, what it's like and what it's like now, or I have to just be quiet about it. Or I didn't know how people were gonna react. I didn't know if they were gonna hate me, if they were gonna support me if I was gonna be honest, and so I just decided you know what, Truth is always the best thing. So I just laid it all out in a letter I read when I got back and, oh my God, the feedback.

Speaker 2: 5:53

Because I'm telling you, this disease does not discriminate. We're talking, you know principles of schools, doctors. We're talking, lawyers, PTA, moms it's not just people that you see on the street drinking out of a paper bag. I mean, it affects every family. Alcoholism does, and use and addiction. So there's been many people that have reached out because I've been so open about it. I was blessed to have a platform and I am now blessed to have a platform to help others. In fact, there's a woman who reached out to me. She was one day sober.

Speaker 2: 6:33

This was 36 days ago, so she's doing great, and so I mean I'm like you know what. If I have a purpose in this life, I think my purpose is this it's to tell people that you don't be ashamed because you are a certain somebody or you have a certain title, but you're struggling, it happens, it does not discriminate and there's help. You just have to reach out and people are so much more supported than you would ever imagine. They really, truly are. I don't remember anyone saying anything negative at all, nothing but support, and San Diego, in particular, is such a loving city, I feel. I think we have a lot of support around this and now, luckily, because of our podcast, hopefully around the world.

Speaker 1: 7:29

Well, I mean, you've always done that, I mean even over the years, just listening to you and watching. Also, now you're lower cane after dark. You've got this charisma about you that, like I said, gives people an opportunity to connect, like you said and that's personal stuff, especially going through the journeys that you've gone through I mean whether it's, like you said, getting sober or things that have happened through your divorce and I know other things that you've gone through. But to make yourself transparent and say, look, this is me, this is who I am, and people can identify with that because they don't feel alone and so many people struggle in silence and just to know there's one more person out there that might be going through the exact same thing is so comforting.

Speaker 2: 8:13

There's a saying we are as sick as our secrets. Oh, that's good, yeah, and so and that makes such sense to me, because you have a secret it could even be a hidden resentment that you have that makes you want to drink over it, you know. So you know it's worth it. It's people come to me or to whoever when they've hit their bottom, whatever their bottom is. But until that person reaches that point of like, oh my God, I surrender, I need to give this up, then you know you kind of have to sit and wait, you know, for them to come to that point.

Speaker 1: 8:55

Yeah, it's tough, but when they do though, I mean the good on the bright side of that is when they do come to that point and they are at the point. You know. There's a saying I'd heard. It's like when you hit rock bottom, now it's your opportunity to become rock solid. You know.

Speaker 2: 9:11

Rock solid and rock it upward.

Speaker 1: 9:13

Yeah.

Speaker 2: 9:13

Totally. I love that. That is so true. Okay, so there's a woman and she has given me permission to say her name because she's very proud of her. Now, 38 days I think this is the one I told you she messaged me and sent me a picture of herself at day one sober, kind of dark, little bit of dark circles, little sallow looking. Obviously she wasn't in her best spirits. Throughout the days she would send me a picture of herself and each day her skin would get clear, her eyes looked brighter, her hair looked shinier. It's like a miracle when you do not put that substance in your body after having done it for so long. Your body just reacts so positively in so many ways.

Speaker 1: 10:09

So how you feel to inside, I mean that's a major accomplishment. I mean you're start to thrive, you start to grow, and knowing that somebody's buying, how wonderful though the fact that you were there to be there and be that support for her, because you've been through it yourself. I always say we don't really know what somebody's going through, we can't understand what somebody's going through, but just having that understanding alone is so powerful. Like I said, you don't want to suffer in silence, you want to know you've got somebody there in your corner.

Speaker 2: 10:42

And alcoholics stay well when we help another alcoholic, so that's how we continue to recover as well. So it's just a giving kind of program thing and I think that I just feel like everybody should go through a program like AA or the 12 Steps, because it just helps you be a better human being and how to deal with stuff.

Speaker 1: 11:04

Well, anything that's going to help you grow and be a better individual, why not? I mean, you don't have to put a tag on, I mean, but you have anything that's going to help you. Personally, that maybe people would understand, like you said, if they've got this idea that having out being alcoholic is drinking out of a paper bag. No, these are people that are professional lifestyles and if everybody went there and even looked into that program, I think people would be a little bit more compassionate when people start to say, hey, listen, I'm recovering, I'm doing this and have that opportunity to be there more of a before, I guess.

Speaker 2: 11:41

Yes, yes, that's what I've noticed about this community. It's just very supportive once you become a part of it. Nice For sure.

Speaker 1: 11:50

I'm going to switch gears a little bit. You had told me earlier that you were all about manifesting and doing some really cool stuff, so I'm just going to hit you up on that one Again. We're friends just here talking, so we're just kind of like sorry, okay.

Speaker 2: 12:08

So I'm not kidding. For the last, I want to say six weeks. Every night, as I'm falling asleep, on YouTube, I'll find sleep, meditation, manifestation, and it's just somebody talking in your ear and it's supposed to go to your subconscious and your subconscious mind is supposed to help with all this manifesting stuff and I'm like, why not? Why not just give it a try? Right, right, right. So three weeks ago, my daughter and I realized that we were about $27,000 short of sending her back to college. Okay, Three weeks ago and a series of events.

Speaker 2: 12:53

Like I said, I'm very transparent. There's a lot of things that I'm currently dealing with and I cannot take on that kind of loan at this point. So we were trying to make other plans or she was going well, maybe, mom, I can do this, and it was killing me inside. So I thought you go ahead. Look, I'm just going to think really hard. I'm going to visualize her there in her dorm at school and what I'm going to do is put in some work and then let the universe handle it. So what I did was I sent an email to the president of the school, the financial aid office and the president of the theater department describing my circumstances, how I'm paying for this all alone. Dad's not in the picture that I have a bankruptcy on my account, so I can't get a loan. My credit score is not good because of the mistakes made in the past.

Speaker 2: 13:56

I'm embarrassed to say that I'm like I'm ashamed to say this. As a woman at my age, I feel like I've let my daughter down, to be quite honest. But then I said this university, which is Fordham, has changed my daughter in such a profound and wonderful way. Her dropping out once it just kills me inside, anyway. So that was the letter. I didn't hear anything back until I got a message from the theater department person and she was like oh my gosh, we loved Evan in class. She was like sunshine personified. I will be her advocate. I didn't know what that meant.

Speaker 2: 14:41

So two weeks ago we get an email new financial aid package. The new package now our only cost was $1,000. My gosh, laura, I was shaking. I'm like, are we looking at this correctly? They gave her some fun for students that were like Evan, you know and just. And then we had one more obstacle. She was 25th on the list, on the waiting list to get housing, and we're like, okay, maybe you can commute from from. You know this person's house and we're trying to figure it out. We get a phone call. Is this Evan Kane? Yes, we have housing for you. We opened up the graduate housing, undergraduate house.

Speaker 2: 15:38

Anyway, we opened something up and she has housing and an apartment and it has a kitchen and and it just fell into our lap and I truly believe, like just picture, visualizing, doing some work and then letting it. Let it just fall into place the way it's supposed to. It will how it's supposed to and now she's just. She has just decorated her own little dormy apartment. She's so happy she just started school. She's like a load. I had to buy her a printer because she has so much to print out, so much reading to do, but she is thrilled and she's more grateful, I think, than any other student that is at that school, because she knows how hard we worked to get her back there and she appreciates absolutely every, every element of that school and that experience because of it.

Speaker 1: 16:38

Wow, wow. I love stories like this. I love this. I mean this, this. Just you know it definitely goes. Oh my gosh, you hear it, you know, you know how to do it, or you, and then all of a sudden, you see it happen, truly happen for somebody, and it's just like you gave me. You gave me goosebumps because it's like I'm so excited to have something amazing like that happen for you. That's great, laura.

Speaker 2: 17:00

It's a miracle. I mean they say it. Miracles are happen. Miracles can happen if you keep an attitude positive and, and especially important, the most important thing from all these videos that I've been listening to for six weeks is live constantly with a grateful heart, be grateful for every. I'm grateful every night for this roof over my house. I live in a duke complex. I've been here 10 years. It's not, you know, the. It's not the newest place in the world, but I am so grateful that I live here. I'm so grateful that I woke up in the morning. I'm so grateful my son, my son and my daughter are are healthy. Like you. You just got to have live with a grateful heart and good things will keep coming.

Speaker 1: 17:48

They will. Yeah, you're right. And gratitude, gratitude is huge. I mean, there's always something to be grateful for, always. You know, and and some people are like, well, I'm going, no, you can find you're up, you're breathing, you're alive. You know, there's always something to be grateful for, you know, and it's it is the most powerful thing you can do in your life. You're absolutely right, you know. I had to learn that one too. It's just, even even when things are just going so haywire, being grateful. It just has that magic spark that just opens up so many other things in your life. You are absolutely right on that one.

Speaker 2: 18:27

Sure does, and so if you live in a constant state of that kind of attitude, then magical things happen. They really do throw it out there, as crazy as it sounds. You know the sky's the limit. Really. Yeah, You're. You only set your own limits.

Speaker 1: 18:47

No, you're right, You're. And people are afraid because it gets so wrapped up in either opinions or whether people are thinking you know, or thinking, or thinking you know for themselves. Oh, it doesn't happen for me. Yes, it can. There's no reason why it couldn't happen for you. None at all. Exactly.

Speaker 2: 19:04

Don't have, don't be no more fear. We're not going to have anymore fear. Yeah, you know what I'm going to write the president of the university. I'm not going to be scared. You know what I lost the other day if I could have a raise, because I deserve one, because you know what, I don't have any fear. He said no. But you know what, whatever I asked and that was, you know, I'm not scared anymore. I'm like, I'm trying not to live like have fear in my heart, just trying to be the strongest possible.

Speaker 1: 19:40

I think there's also two. When you live your life being fearless, you're right it's like what's the worst thing that's gonna happen. They're gonna say, no, you know, or it's not gonna happen, or it's not the right timing. You know, just because it's not the right timing doesn't mean it can't happen later on down the road. I mean, my gosh, you never know unless you ask. I've learned that. I was like what am I afraid of? If you say no to me, it's okay. It's not the end of the world.

Speaker 2: 20:03

It's not the end of the world. Nobody has died and it's just a rejection, and you know what? That's part of life. Don't make it a bad thing. Just turn it into a good thing, like, okay, well, maybe something better is coming for me, maybe you know, maybe another job is gonna fall into my lap. You just never know. You never know, but you are, everything happens for a reason. I totally believe that too.

Speaker 1: 20:28

Yeah, I do too. And the other thing I've learned on what you said is, even though it's a rejection a lot of times, I think these choices that are made by other people, they're not rejecting you personally. They're rejecting on their own beliefs or what their own issues are, or whatever's going on in their life. Because I've learned that too, because I'm offering everything you possibly can want. So and if you're telling me no, I'm not taking it personal it means either your timing's not right, something's going on with you, or you're not seeing the same thing I am, so maybe we're not a good fit to begin with. Anyway, you know.

Speaker 2: 21:02

That is a good point. You don't know what people are dealing with, right? You know they might be dealing with something so hard at home and we have no idea, so you also have to just be compassionate as possible, I think, to everyone that you see on the street someone who smirks at you. It's not about you, maybe it's not about you at all. He just has a sour look on his face. I like that book. Now I'm not gonna remember the four, but have you heard of the four agreements?

Speaker 1: 21:38

Yeah, yes.

Speaker 2: 21:39

Yeah, so the one. I'm gonna try to remember the four agreements. One of them is never make assumptions, which is perfect, because half the time it's not about you at all.

Speaker 1: 21:52

What is that about? What assumption is? When you assume something, you make an ass out of you and me.

Speaker 2: 21:59

So yeah, yeah, I was hearing that when I was young and thinking, god, that is so clever. Okay, and be true to your word is another one Do not take things personally. That is a huge one Because, just like you were saying this person, it's not about you at all, it's completely about them and what's going on with them. So don't take it personally, don't let it hurt your heart. And then I forgot the other one, but it's a really dang it. I'm gonna kick myself later, but it's a really great book. It's called the Four Agreements and it's just like it's just another way to live life happier and better.

Speaker 1: 22:48

I mean, everybody's going through something and life is a journey. To begin with, what do you decide to do with it? It's really up to you is how you deal with it. It really is. I look at that every single day. I look back on some of the stuff that I've been through or what I've done and I'm like is this gonna really matter? I was thinking is this gonna matter six months from now? Is this gonna matter a year from now? Is this gonna matter five years from now? Because if it's not, then how much time do I wanna waste on it now? I really wanna get over it because I don't wanna allow to consume me and take up so much of my time when I know that a year from now it's really not gonna matter.

Speaker 2: 23:26

Yeah, that reminds me of another saying that I'm probably gonna say wrong. Like you drink the poison hoping to make kill the other person, or something. Like you're actually poisoning yourself. You know what I'm trying to say? Yes, yes, it's completely wrong?

Speaker 1: 23:41

Yeah, no, no, it's, but you had you on the right track. It was. Resentment is like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die.

Speaker 2: 23:48

Oh okay, I'm so bad at those things, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry You're just pillow-faced. Yeah, exactly, I made it my own. I made it my own. It's a lorriesm I drew, totally, totally.

Speaker 1: 24:12

Well, I wanna give we got a few more minutes, but I wanna give a shout out Please, please, please, go to YouTube channel it's also going to be in the description to a Lorricane After Dark and you're on the radio now, aren't you?

Speaker 2: 24:24

Aren't you on some of those shows at?

Speaker 1: 24:25

the moment that, and San Diego.

Speaker 2: 24:27

Yes, I do traffic part-time, so you might hear me doing traffic before it's on any of the stations in San Diego. It just depends on the day, and I'm on the weekends I do star 94-1. I'm on the DJ at night and in the early morning, so you can hear me star 94-1. And then my podcast is me and my best friend, eric, and he's hysterical and we talk about our lives, like my dating life, which is pretty much not existent at this point. We have a producer who could be my child because he's 23 years old, but he acts like he's 45 and he teases me all the time and it's really funny and together we just we laugh. We do celebrity gossip. We try products. We interview interesting people too. I really love our interviews. I in fact there's somebody that's incredibly interesting and I can't even wait for her to be on the podcast and it's gonna be on September 25th. We live stream on Instagram and YouTube. This person is going to blow up Laura Kane Afterdart. Her name is Coach Mickey. I'm so excited.

Speaker 1: 25:55

You are, so I know I cannot wait to be on your podcast. I'm looking forward to it. It really is. It's funny you were saying about manifesting, putting things out there. All these years that I've connected with you and heard you, and now here we are doing stuff together and I've always thought, oh my gosh, who knows? You never know. So how fun is that.

Speaker 2: 26:19

It is really cool. And I'm really proud of you for everything that you have accomplished, because I know how hard you have worked. You hustle, and I love it. You really do, and it's paid off.

Speaker 1: 26:34

Yeah, as you know what, though? Just keep, just surround yourself with good people, keep doing like you said what you believe in, you know, see it, believe it and just don't. You know my dad always says you know, sometimes you just got a blow through an obstacle with dynamite. You don't let it get to you, you're just gonna go around it, go over it, go through it, blow it up if you have to, but don't allow an obstacle to take away what you really really wanna do.

Speaker 2: 26:59

I love that. Blow it away with dynamite. Yeah, I didn't even say that one, right, but I know. But I love that. That's really cool. It's so true.

Speaker 1: 27:16

Well, thank you so much for being with me today. I've always had so much fun with you, whether it's at a pajama party or just hanging out like this. You know you are so much fun, so much fun.

Speaker 2: 27:27

I can't wait to have you over here and thank you so much for having me on your podcast. I'm very honored.

Speaker 1: 27:33

Yeah Well, my pleasure, the pleasure is all mine. I'm glad you took the time. Guys, please reach out to Laura, please. You guys will love her. Laura Kane, after Dark. It is so much fun, it is unfiltered, so I will tell that some of the people that and it is. But you know it's fun, it's spicy and fun After Dark. That's right. I love you, girlfriend. Thank you so much for being with me. I can't wait to be with you at the end of the month.

Speaker 2: 28:02

Love you too, so much, can't wait to see you and thank you.

Speaker 1: 28:05

Bye All right bye guys. Thanks for being with us. See you next week.